The Bible says we are to “preserve” unity not “produce” it – “being diligent to preserve the unity” (Ephesians 4:3).  When we try to make our spouse be more unified and pleasant toward us we begin to have wrong actions and attitudes.  Our goal must be instead to influence change not make things change.  We do this by diligently applying the four attitudes mentioned in the previous verse (Ephesians 4:2), “with all humility, gentleness, patience, and forbearance in love\”.  But this is not easy to do when things are going so very poorly – when the love given is not returned – when indifference, selfishness and disappointment is the norm.  Certainly there are many times God’s Word instructs us to speak to our spouse about such things. (Ephesians 4:15, 26-27, 29-30). But what will motivate loving responses like humility, gentleness, patience, forbearance as we decide how and when to speak and to deal with all this? We do this by having a heart that Paul speaks of one verse earlier, (Ephesians 4:1), “As a prisoner for the Lord, then, I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received.” 

This blog and the course \”Unity in Marriage\” will seek to introduce you to thought patterns that will promote such a heart to be such an influence for unity in marriage.  If this is something you desire than this blog and course is for you.

First, how to renew your heart for  Christ and spouse daily by thinking on Biblical thoughts that stir spiritual motivators; second, how to develop new habits weekly in how you relate with your spouse in key areas that God\’s word emphasizes for marriage. 

The Unity in Marriage course focuses on habit growth in seven biblical marriage essentials: 1) Communication, 2) Role Fulfillment, 3) Team-work,
4) Delighting in Differences, 5) 5 Levels of Companionship, 6) Sexual Intimacy, and 7) Financial Goals

This course seeks to teach you how to be renewed in four key spiritual
motivators to empower development in these seven marriage habits:  1) Fear of the Lord, 2) Hope in the Lord, 3) Love for the Lord and spouse, and  4) Humility toward the Lord and spouse.

The resources on this blog will help you stay encouraged to be faithful to keep promoting unity in your marriage.  Taking the eight week course entitled “Unity in Marriage” will help lay a solid foundation of Biblical principles and spiritual concepts.  The goal is that this blog will serve to facilitate ongoing application of what is taught in that course.  But even if you have not taken the course, our hope is that you will gain from the resources and articles on this blog.  To learn more about how to sign up for the next “Unity in Marriage” course contact Lowcountry Biblical Counseling Center: (843)278-0072,, or